Some artwork for a change...

A recent convo at work, which, given my current temperament, I thought at least mildly amusing.

Slug-A-Muggle: KB or Kb or kb?
B: kilobits or kilobytes?
Slug-A-Muggle: lol
Slug-A-Muggle: hold on
Slug-A-Muggle: bytes
B: KB
Slug-A-Muggle: k

It's a dry computer version of Flik's hurried stammering: No! Ha ha ha! Sorry. No, no, see it's classified in the DMZ, gotta go ASAP, you know, strictly BYOB. Bye!

What the?? or Armageddon approaches

Jonas brothers, Jonas brothers, Jonas brothers!!!... where are they?
I'm sorry but when I came across this photo in the news, I couldn't help notice the poor onlooker's troubled countenance. It makes me wonder if Miley Cyrus was at all embarrassed to be pole-dancing in front of her peers. (I dare not consider her doing it in front of another demographic, however... *shudders*) It seems to me that we have another would-be Madonna on our hands, just rarin' for the sickly side of the limelight enjoyed by other artists-turned-media-hookers: Janet Jackson, Mariah Carey, Britney, Christina, etc., etc., etc.,

WOW! No, really!!!!

Well, I thought I was over WoW or Warcraft in general... and then this! Blizzard really is out to get us...



I kinna believe it!!

The Death Cab for Cutie days

I'm reminiscing: reviewing my earliest blog entries, recalling the LIZ factor, even conceitedly relishing my old poetry as if it sprang from someone else's melancholy mind; the Death Cab for Cutie days, the peanut-butter-saltine-cracker-sandwich days, the movie-a-week days, and being-lost-and-found-at-the-same-time days. I miss them. Truthfully, I miss my blog friends. I call out to you folks through the ether and bid you a warm virtual clap on the shoulder and a hearty hello. Until next time...

G-farce or People Are Stupid

Look out! They're coming from the sky and they'll pee anywhere!

Okay. Alright. I get that some of you hard-working Americans think you're doing yourself a HUGE favor after a long work-week by going to a theater to absorb yet another gluttonous downpour of mindless drivel, thanks to the now very unscrupulous, artless moguls that are master over Hollywood (and perhaps, the world). But THIS! THIS is number one?! At all? THIS managed to exceed the earnings of a wonderful film like the latest Harry Potter ANY weekend?

I suppose parents will coyly suggest that this movie is perfect for the kids. Nay! NO! It will turn your children into the horde of video-gaming, consumerist oafs who use dude repeatedly and end up setting themselves on fire and then posting it on YouTube.

So please, please America, I beg you! Turn away from this detritus and stop stupidity at its root!!! C'mon! Do it for the children!!!!!

From an instant messenger convo at work...
Count Dookie says:
I'm not your typical male
so any considerable levels of testosterone and/or sportiness
and I shut down
I just don't want to talk to anyone who says dude profusely
or seems to have the emotional capacity of concrete
K says:
no male bonding for you, ha ha. No, that's cool. I can relate a little when it comes to girls who primp and keep the drama coming.
Count Dookie says:
I'm talking specifically about the kind of guys who form an informal group like "Team Awesome" and who use those long tables you see in every church building to do some impromptu bobsledding at a ward activity, or cannot seem to funciton without emitting hoots and hollers
in short, I really cannot abide a neanderthal
though doubtless everyone else may impressed with them
if I recall, there was a time that I admired their hooligan bravado from afar
but just didn't understand it
and now have come to fear it
though once I may have chuckled at it
K says:
That is awesome. I totally know the kind you're talking about and i usually keep as far away from them as possible, too.

Harry Potterin' (I coined it! It's mine!!)

From an e-mail I sent on July 15th...
We saw [Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince] beginning at 11:59 pm...[Tuesday evening, the 14th] there was a costume contest (I'd call it a "get-up" contest, since so much of Harry Potterin' draws from one's own scarf collection) in which Amber competed, but unfortuntely didn't win (there was a flock of boisterious thespians charming the audience from the outset). Amber did a lovely turn as "Tonks," the pink-haired witch in love with a werewolf, even performing a flourish with her cape to woo the crowd, but to no avail. These thespians came as predictable "Harry, Ron, Hermione, ... Hoo!" Who? Who but a giddy young thing dressed (sparingly) as Hedwig, Harry's owl. Still, their exuberance had won everyone over. These four were part of a group that formed an impromptu choir that happily entertained the rest of the crowd with a song from "Potter Puppet Pals" of YouTube notoriety. ("Snape, Snape, Severus Snape... Dumbledore!!...")

As you know I'm wont to tear movies to shreds, and despite myself I couldn't help but laugh when I believe I was meant to, mourn when it was intended, or just be enthralled over all by the movie. It struggles during some of the first few moments, especially if you've read the book recently and observe some of the changes made, but on the whole I can say that I'm in love with this movie. I'm putting it right up there with some legendary favorites, because David Lynch, the director, seems to have treated the Potterverse with uncanny sensitivity, if only for the fans, and yet managed to compress the considerable length of the book into a cohesive, charming, and I daresay epic couple of hours. I could go on gushing, but I think I'll let you discover for yourself the estimable joys of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince...

I saw the above while perusing Ryan Wood's links. It's by someone named Ani, in Bordeaux, France. It's possibly the most charming thing I can recall seeing for a long time. Perhaps I've become resentful of illustration (to the extent that I've begun loathing a lot of it) because I cannot seem to find the time to do it.

Just thought that if anyone should read this, they'd get a kick out the ogre's expression, the lovely glow billowing across his bulk, etc.

Le sigh

Thankfully I have emerged from my young days of summers past of braving the risky summer movie roulette wheel and regularly having my hopes dashed (not to mention my pocket book) a little wiser. No, I will NOT be seeing the new Transfomers movie, prompted both by the fear that the aforementioned stirs within me but numerous reviews and my wife's persistent scoffing.

I did find an article that in a tangential way reflects my current thinking.

The general critical response to Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is mostly a mad rush to find the right metaphor to describe how it feels to be trapped in a working food blender for two and a half hours. Although many critics have also generously found time to despise the plot, the characters, the dialogue and the special effects, it’s the two and a half hours that seems to grate the most. What does this movie think it is? Titanic?

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is indeed way too long, but that’s part of movie-making this year. At the recent Cannes film festival, film after film unspoiled at unconscionable length — “two and a half hours is the new 90 minutes,” someone said...

...In this company two-hour movies — like Ang Lee’s Taking Woodstock — seemed modest. But not as modest as Wild Grass (Les Herbes Folles), a lovely little bit of ambiguity by French master Alan Resnais that managed to tell a complex, teasing little story of love and obsession in 104 minutes. It was announced this week that Wild Grass is coming to the Toronto film festival, along with another movie from a legendary director, Manoel de Oliveira’s Eccentrities of a Blonde-Haired Girl, which is also about love and obsession. It runs for 63 minutes.

Significantly, Renais is 89 years old and Oliveira turns 101 in December: they understand about time. It’s precious, and who has two and a half hours to spend on robots?

Taken from canada.com

I'm not much for politicking and its accordant contention, but this flash movie by JibJab is just too awesome to resist...

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

More antics...

K says:
Yeah...I meant to explain further. As you would guess, I prefer quiet entrances.
Darth Vitreoussays:
again... ninja
I find that happens more when I leave...
my exits can be "spectral"
but I'm almost the first one here and there are three people present
so I have to say "hi" or else they might feel slighted...
but you can be a ninja...
I won't MAKE you say hi...
I'll just try to be better at detecting the faint passage of air to my left or right
and be prepared to dodge shurikens and nunchuks
*I apologize: there's really no way to describe the subtle movement of a ninja without making it sound like a fart*

Transformers Revisited

A recent messenger convo with my boss: (I'm Darth Vitreous).

Darth Vitreous says:
I have a confession to make
W says:
yes?
Darth Vitreous says:
I recently discovered that I'm angry at the Transformers movie
W says:
Pray telll
Darth Vitreous says:
I liked Shia LeBeouff
and I LOVE the Transformers
especially good ol' Optimus Prime
but two things destroyed that movie (and possibly the franchise) for me forever
W says:
*gasp*
Darth Vitreous says:
1)John Turturro
2)Megan Fox
I think I posted something about this on my blog
lol
but John Turturro's character was neither funny or fearsome to me
and he had to be either
but was annoying
and awkward
W says:
I concur, I didn't see his character as necessary
Darth Vitreous says:
Megan Fox does not represent 99.9% of the high school level population on this planet
and not many girls I knew would slither around a car like a centerfold
that is, she seemed (and still does) like a hormonal ploy
and that irritates me
the character would have been much more interesting if she were less Maxim-esque and more bookish, quirky, intelligent, dramatic, spooky, sullen, etc.
that is, if she were a character and not a pin-up
those are my two main problems
the one saving grace is Peter Cullen's voice returning as Optimus Prime
W says:
indeed; had they had someone different I don't know that I could have seen the movie...
Darth Vitreous says:
this is what I posted on my blog on July 4th, 2007

I won't bother with summary, etc. but will say that fans of the cartoon will feel a renewed sense of manly security when they hear Optimus Prime's booming, pseudo-synthesizer radiating in voice over and reminding we measly humans that all will be well. The voice (done by Peter Cullen, who, incidentally, is also the voice of Eeyore) silences the noise of terrorism (a la rumors of war), government and corporate corruption, or even the daily mundanities of trying to muck out a living. It's downright therapeutic. I may just get the movie only to replay those moments when I'm stressed.

W says:
well said!
Darth Vitreous says:
I just had to get that off my chest...
lol

On Putrescent Pond...

I chanced upon this in a random search about a disease caused by fecal matter in swimming pools (don't ask, I saw a commercial once), and saw the author's name. It's just too stupendous!!!
Enjoy!

Jedi Knight: Jedi Outcast

Some screenshots from the good old days, when one could while one's life away using Jedi powers playing capture the flag.

I loved to use the codes to summon twenty Luke Skywalkers to come to my aid, or to have bad and good Jedi scrap en masse. Naturally such epic battles crashed my computer. A lot.





And then were times I'd just spawn characters from the air using noclip, or hover over them, force-lift them up and drop them, or blitzkrieg them mercilessly.







And then on occasion, I'd actually play online :) (To the clan of JC2—may its legacy never die—and other good-humored gamers, thanks for the memories!)

LearnKey

This is what I spend my time (occasionally) doing at LearnKey in Cedar City. I make slides to tell people how to use programs or develop business acumen. I also listen to movie soundtracks and do little animations...

Painting III Project

Calling all models w/in the Cedar City area! :) I am an Illustration major at SUU, and am currently doing three paintings that could be called "fantasy portraits." My project demands three different figures in dramatic costume. (I'll be photographing you in said costume.) I'd really like to get my painting underway, and I could offer a (very) modest compensation (as in $10 or so for a solid hour's time).

The following are the ideal models I have in mind (expecting average height for costume purposes):
1) Female, age 20-35, light blonde (long hair), blue eyes, fair skin, body type: slender; mood words: fear, alarm, melancholy.
2) Male, age 20-35, dark brown (very short- "Caesar"), dark eyes, dark olive/pale brown skin, body type: built but still having a neck; mood words: sullen, weary, angry.
[3) Female, age 20-35, red hair, green/hazel eyes, freckled skin, body type: slender, petite?; mood words: fierce, suspicion, pensive.
If you approximate the above descriptions, (even if you don't have the exact hair color), please contact me!
There's no modeling experience required, but a talent/taste for acting would be ideal!

The best way to reach me would be via e-mail (with included photos of yourself!)

Twilight

So I haven't seen the movie, and despite my wife's protests, likely won't before Christ shows up. Still, we're sitting together at the SUU library and looking at reviews. Metacritic.com includes some scathing stuff. Peter Vondar Haar of "Film Threat" quips "Q: When is a vampire not a vampire? A: When it goes out in daylight, sees itself in a mirror, doesn’t drink human blood, and still manages to suck."

Love Your Body, Drop Dead Refreshing!

So here I am, trying to be productive: as I'm waiting for LiveTrace ™ to do its thing, I look for poster contests, something to get my perennially stunted art career going. I go to the first viable link that Google coughs up—which this time, miracle of miracles, happens to be the first link on their main list—and I arrive at a "Love your Body" contest, which, while being clearly out of my purview, since it seems that their winners—(that I can see)—have all been female, nonetheless seems worth investigating. So, as per the instructions in the contest, I attempt to familiarize myself with just what Loving One's Body means. In perusing the offending ads, I chuckled... at this.
And what made me laugh wasn't the clearly sexual overtone of the image; clearly, using an image of a woman as a vessel for liquor, and that too shapely (and therefore not in line with any equitably realistic portrayal of the female body) is offensive, not just to women, but men also (whether they know it or not). But at first read I truly thought that "OFFENSIVE TO WOMEN" was part of the ad. "Offensive to Women. Drop Dead Refreshing." It smacks of the Man Show, of course, but NOW had plastered Offensive all over the ads it deemed (and rightly so) degenerate. I missed it! A case of male insensitivity? or is it just poor visual communication? You decide... (I hope not so much of the former...)

Twice dumbstruck

Twice today I've been dumbstruck by the frightening parallels between declining Book of Mormon civilizations and the global downspiral I'm reading about in the news. The Book of Mormon tells that the ancient societies of this continent began their destruction with elitist notions of fashion, on a number of occasions. I'm interpreting things loosely here, but when Mormon records that pride, in particular that which had to do with the "wearing of costly apparel" preceded a division "into classes" and a subsequent persecution of Christ's apostles, even so much as to attempt to murder them, I see the tell-tale warning regarding our day. According to a study by labor economist Lynn A. Karoly, the income gap in the United States is widening, with, in fact, the rich getting richer and the poor getting poorer.

I also just read a remarkable article about the housing crisis in the New York Times dated Monday, April 14th, 2008 (today) that uses fairly circuitous language in placing blame for economic woes. Isn't it clear to everyone that the United States has again placed the world in crisis because of an irresponsible lust for prestige, or at the very least for property? According to the article by Mark Landler, the struggling housing market's effect is rippling across the globe, mostly induced by a lack of consumer confidence, even across the Atlantic. In markets where things were hot, like East Europe and Hong Kong, things are cooling considerably. Yet much of the language lays blame to some economic deus ex machina, the proverbial hand of fate, for the problem. It seemed reminiscent of the peoples of the Book of Mormon, who would reject the wisdom of the prophets and then lament their dead, their starvation, etc. though had they heeded God's direction they would have continued to prosper.

I'd use more references to make the correlation more apparent, but I've lingered long enough and need to get home to my sweetheart and son.