Monday, October 11, 2004

Women!!!

Just a random thought: why must women be so irritatingly irresistible?! Perhaps some clarification is in order . . . Why must women possess this mystique that drives men mad?? Furthermore, why is it that women are then surprised to find men so aggressive?

32 comments:

  1. Sigh. Here is the advice I give to everyone (yet so few listen): girls are jerks; stay away from them. What woman has you newly captivated, Taylor?

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  2. I have the same question... Now you HAVE to answer, it Taylor :).

    And I agree, girls can be jerks, but guys can definitely be jerks, too. Lately they've been jerks more often than not.

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  3. Ha, well I've known a female jerk or two. Taylor, you need to answer our question! Who is your latest romantic interest??

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  4. Anonymous9:08 PM

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  5. Anonymous9:18 PM

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  6. Well, I must clarify by saying that a woman can be sugary, understanding, etc. and still be irritating. And to answer the question and evade it at the same time, I'll say that in general women drive me insane. Thankfully, I've learned a modicum of temperance as of late and do not loathe going up to campus or attending social events due to the doubtless horde of heavenly women who attend such places/activities. Regrettably, I used to come down the west hill of campus in a barely-containted frustrated conniption because of seeing so many unattainable vixens.

    My thought is that while some women enjoy tormenting men I believe the bulk of them are just by nature tender, aloof, and alluring, etc.

    I suppose it's futile to voice my feelings when it's clear that after all my years of romantic pining and poetry I still cannot wrap my brain around it. In fact, I'm befuddled such that I don't remember what "it" is anymore.

    So no biggie. On Planet Taylor women will not be attractive or men will cease having any hormonal reactions to them. Ah! Can you just feel that serenity?? No more getting swept away by luscious eyes, famously fathomless smiles, and curvaceous figures, etc. Man (and I mean males) would finally be at peace. I'm convinced we wage war because we have to vent the awesome energy that women by their sheer charisma and stunning appearance instill in us and have little other means than the ultimate annihilation of all mankind. Tragic, no? Hehe. So say it! I'm a nut.

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  7. Oh, and to answer Sabi specifically, I would say that I've heard enough of women complaining about assorted male advances being clumsy or uncouth, and I find that laughably ignorant. If I weren't so bedazzled by a woman's overwhelming mystique, I wouldn't be tripping on my way to the fantastic finishing punchline. So curse you, foxy ladies all! I unclog my nose in your general direction! Hahahahah! But are women jerks? Not in my opinion. To be frank, I more resent my own incapacity to shun them completely and be generally independent of their control, however subliminal and/or unintentional.

    Likewise, I may also be resenting, in an all too male way, the fact that come what may I will never have the power over a woman that she will know over me. I have not, nor doubt I ever will, mesmerize a woman so as to topple her senses. (Though I realize there are men out there who have done so and much more.)

    Also, may I suggest that my difficulties come from all too often letting my notoriously sinister hormones loose? My conviction is that the world would benefit much from more restraint, especially in that department, than reckless abandon, and certainly in my individual case. Put bluntly? I'm a wolf in sheep's clothing. They're usually shot. :) Good thing I'm game warden at my apartment! Woot! I'm so diabolical.

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  8. Oh, and to respond to Liz's astute, if not misinformed counsel: I would "stay away" if it were chemically, metaphysically, or---haha!---ecumenically possible. In other words, you're all soo-o--#$^Q#%@#$%#@$%@#% sassafrassin' darn doodily a$@$#@%@$##@ . . . yeah. That. What I said . . . ahem!

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  9. I feel it a blog liberty to complain openly. :) Fain would I suggest that what I say is God's doctrine, or an otherwise incontrovertible truth. It is strictly based on my penchant for over-analyzation and mental self-haranguing that I staunchly defend at least a few of my sentiments. I have pondered/mulled over/browbeaten these notions enough to believe that at least a grain or two is worthy of consideration.

    Also, I beg your pardon for my wordy rhetoric. It stands to reason that one who loves words, truly adores them, considers them precious and thus uses them sparingly. So . . . I'm a word whore. Not much else to say after that!!!

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  10. Oh, and I don't know that I love it. Deep down I'm sure that's what makes me the proverbial glutton for romantic punishment, but as my surface feelings will readily attest I am also steadily having to stave off a whopping bout of bitterness. So, it's more of a love-hate thing.

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  12. Another thought (it happens a lot!): I wonder if women don't entirely understand my argument because they don't suffer in the same way a man does. I'm speaking of a POWERFUL motivation here, that perhaps most women don't have to fight because they're already the conquerors. Bah. I need to learn silence, if only periodically. Until next time, lords and ladies.

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  13. I would just like to say that, as confusing and impossibly alluring as women are, men can be too. They are confusing little buggers, and sometimes I just really, honestly want to give up on them all. Then I resolve to, and they get upset!

    Dear men,
    Please make up your minds and get back to me on it. I cannot take much more waffling back and forth. I'm afraid that months of indecision wear away at my nerves, and it's entirely possible that the next time you oscillate, I will kill you.

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  14. Well, I understand that the frustration exists on both sides, though perhaps in different forms; the tragedy is that the struggle never ends, even in marriage. To pleasure and the pain of the uphill, ladies and gents! Er, onward and upward?!

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  15. Wow, this is comment #19! That's gotta be a record.

    I like this "liz" girl... Great comment... Boys are ridiculously confusing and I'm sick of it. I give up sometimes, too. They change their minds out of nowhere and I don't get it.

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  16. Oh, and to Brenda: I recognize that in terms of bodily functions and so forth that women, just as men, can be gross, even putrid. And strangely, I'm still compelled to "discover" all their secret parts, in particular, those that exist in their hearts. If only I were a KEYMASTER!!!

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  17. Okay, whatever, #20... Taylor beat me to #19.

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  18. Oh, how I'd love to shatter the unofficial confidentiality law of the internet!! Liz is no stranger, Sam!

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  20. It's true! I've even talked to you before. I'd like to talk to you more, especially knowing you're a kindred spirit.

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  21. Are you talking to me? I think maybe we did talk on Sunday come to think of it. Who told you I was a kindred spirit? Haha...

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  22. I think that Liz was suggesting that you two share some ideas . . . As in, guys can be jerks, too . . .

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  23. Haha... okay. We'll talk soon, Liz :).

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  24. BRENDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  25. I want to hear the story now.

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  26. Haha! Sam made it stiiiiiinky! Weeeeeeeee! Stinky Sam! :) Hehe . . . Yay! New ammunition . . . she'll think twice about pounding my bony arms now!

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  27. Whaaaaa? I did not make it stinky. But Brenda is right, that bathroom sure did stink sometimes. We would have to keep the stupid window open even in the wintertime when it was freezing outside. But just so you all know, I DO know how to flush a toilet. Unfortunately someone in our hall did not.

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  28. Unfortunately that's all there is to the story, Liz. Not too exciting. However, I do have another story I can share with you sometime... Also having to do with mine and Brenda's wonderful dorm hall bathroom...

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  29. I was just teasing . . . sheesh! :) Don't hurt me! I'm a bleeder!

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  30. Really, I lived in the dorms for a year, you don't need to share. I know how it goes. Someone (or perhaps several) people on my floor also didn't know how to flush a toilet. I think that should be a minimum requirement for attending college.

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  31. Ha, well, yes... But my story is extra special... I can almost guarantee that it didn't happen in your hall... Let's just say I went to the honor code office :D Brenda, hopefully you aren't sick of the story, though it seems like it was long ago... It still humors me.

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  32. Now you have to tell me this story. Story Time! Yay!

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